


the day the world stopped spinning

by bimothra



Category: Half Life VR But The AI Is Self-Aware
Genre: gordon is an asshole and benrey likes it, im sorry freelatta and tomrey fans :(, this isn’t even frenrey i’m just sorry.
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:48:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 11,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25562359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bimothra/pseuds/bimothra
Summary: Hypothetically, a player who doesn’t bother roleplaying as Gordon would end in certain disaster.
Comments: 97
Kudos: 528





	1. Chapter 1

Gordon Freeman was a man who, after graduating from MIT, worked at Black Mesa. He was to be the test subject for the-

Blah, blah, blah, you’ve all fucking played Half-Life before. This wasn’t even the popular Half-Life.

“Gordon” just picked this one over Half-Life 2 to mess around in because HL2 wasn’t in VR yet. Plus the scientist voices were pretty funny, all things considered.

STAPH!

Heh heh. 

Anyways, Gordon wasn’t here to roleplay or get immersed or anything like that. No, Gordon saw the VERY experimental VR build Valve had released and decided that he would really like nothing more than to fuck around with Gmod assets. There were whispers going around that Valve had upgraded the scientist AI, and even though they were no Bethesda, Gmod was the master and king of ragdolling.

So it’d be funny to break them. 

Gordon- yes, you’re gonna fucking call him Gordon, he’s not telling you his real name- triumphantly strode down the hallway, eyes hungrily staring into the guard models’ faces for his first victim. 

Nope. No. Nada. Literally all of them were just staring at nothing, and still very ugly.

Stupid Barnies. 

Gordon grumbled, marching further down the hallway and ignoring how loud the CLANK-CLANK-CLUNK of his HEV suit’s footsteps were. 

Gordon turned the corner, continuing to study each guard’s face-

No, no... this one was strange. It had eyes that followed him, a shadow under that helmet that wasn’t QUITE right. Those eyes... they were KNOWING.

“hey.”

The guard’s voice was tinny, but not quite metallic- a tired-sounding, bored monotone that was only further corrupted by the horrific sound quality of the VR game. 

Gordon blinked, adjusting his glasses as he leaned closer, waiting to see what the guard would do next.

“why are you staring at me sir.”

“do you need my passport? i can show you mine if you show me yours, please. sir.”

Gordon blinked, furrowing his brow. Okay, clearly this one was either already fucking broken or some kind of troll snuck into his play session. 

He tugged at the guard’s cheeks, squinting as his canines appeared to be WAY too sharp- only for Gordon to blink and them to appear normal.

“Hey. You’re not another player, are you? God dammit, I have multiplayer on my Steam turned OFF. Noah, I swear if this is you, you little shit-“

“passport, please? sir?” The guard said, albeit a bit muffled thanks to Gordon tugging at his cheek.

Gordon let go, stifling a chuckle. Putting a hand on his hip, he cleared his throat. “Hey, buddy. I don’t have to give you anything. You don’t even have to do your job. It’s all fake. All of this.” 

He waited with a smile to see how this new, ‘reactive’ AI would tumble in on itself, but the guard simply cocked his head slightly, staring at Gordon with a stare he never really broke. 

“okay, cool, but i need credentials? show some id, man.” 

Gordon sighed, rubbing his temples. “Look- I don’t have time for this. I’m Gooordon Freeeman,” he said, waving his hands around and dragging his name out for emphasis. “There. Dialogue flag triggered or whatever.”

The guard folded his arms, looking up and down at this new person. “i think you need to calm down.” 

“...Calm down, he says,” Gordon scoffed.

“Aaaaaaa~” The guard sang, and Gordon blinked in surprise.

No, that guard was NOT singing. That was the Wowozela! Gordon smirked. This guard wasn’t the ONLY one who could use their Gmod add-ons.

“Aaaaaaaaaa~” Gordon sang back smugly, and this time it was the guard’s turn to be surprised. 

“See? We’re both calm. Just a couple of calm bros, who do NOT need passports,” Gordon sang, pushing the guard’s helmet into his eyes as he sauntered down the hallway. 

The guard quickly ran back up to Gordon’s side, and Gordon snorted in amusement. “What, you my partner now? This an escort mission?”

“who ARE you, man?” Benrey asked, wide-eyed.

“To you? Gordon,” Gordon said idly. “How about your name? They give you a name, or should I just call you Barney? Y’know. Since you’re a Barney.”

The guard paused, almost like he was thinking up a name of his own. 

“...benrey.”

“Benrey,” Gordon repeated with a coy smile. “You make that one yourself?”

“mhm.”

“It works. Nice to meet you, Ben-rey,” Gordon said, getting used to the name on his tongue. 

“benrey,” Benrey parroted back.

Pretty soon, the two of them were just meandering through the hall, going through a routine of yelling ‘Benrey’ and using the Wowozela on eachother. They were only interrupted by Gordon literally bumping into another NPC. 

“Hello!” He squeaked, his voice also getting crushed through the audio quality. His voice was still very recognizable, however- a youthful lilt that cracked and tripped on itself from time to time, repeating some words, mucking up others, but there was something very genuine about it.

Too genuine.

Gordon had found his next victim. 

He looked at Benrey with a mischievous smirk, eyes spelling out ‘check this shit out’ wordlessly. Benrey gave him some catlike eyes back.

“this is tommy. tommy likes mean people.”

“Tommy,” Gordon repeated.

“tommy.”

“Tommy!” Tommy added. “I was just- just heading to the break room! Follow me!”

“Oh, I could do that... Orrrr...” Gordon fake-yawned, quickly pulling up his weapons menu and taking out a phys-gun which he definitely was not supposed to have. “ORRR I could throw you there instead.”

“Uh...” Tommy looked at the gun nervously. “This- this doesn’t seem to code, Mister-“

“Don’t worry, it’ll be fun. Watch.” Gordon swung the gun around, the blue beam spinning around Tommy like a lasso and grabbing onto him. Tommy went flying into the air, and his eyes squeezed shut in anticipation, only to realize Gordon was merely bringing him along floating through the hallway.

“That’s, um... that’s quite the device you have there, Mr. Freeman...” Tommy muttered, gesturing to the phys-gun as Gordon put him down in the break room.

“Thanks,” Gordon replied. “It’s not really allowed in this game but It’s too useful to leave behind. ‘Specially on this map.”

“...Huh?” Tommy croaked out quietly, but before he could get more answers, Gordon had already left to the lockers. 

“Ah! Hello, Gordon!” A scientist chirped happily.

“Hey, doc. None of this is real,” Gordon said, power-walking past the doctor as his expression went from one of glee to existential horror in no time flat. 

“hey, hey, woah, woah, slow down, man.. i got tiny little baby legs, i can’t keep upppp,” Benrey complained, huffing and puffing as Gordon strode into the next area.

“Well, don’t worry. These boring old hallways will get real exciting soon,” Gordon assured, wrenching the next door open with a phys-gun.

“Wh- sir! SIR! What the hell are you doing?!” A crabby-looking scientist marched up to Gordon as he shoved his body through the door-crack he had made.

Gordon looked up, unamused. “Uhhh. Advancing the plot, obviously?”

“...Well, I suppose you have your Hazard Suit, so it’s all good...” He muttered, stroking his chin.

“Yep. That’s my player model, alright.” Gordon somersaulted into the room, tapping his foot as he waited for the sequenced plot to get over itself and start moving. 

He had something very special he wanted to do in the test chamber. 

Eventually, the mumbly scientists mumbled their way through their dialogue, and Gordon was finally, FINALLY allowed into the test chamber.

Oh, look, Benrey was there, too.

“Hey. That’s called a noclip,” Gordon said, patting Benrey on the shoulder. “You know that, right? You know you’re not supposed to be in the test chamber?”

“no, i think- i think you’re not supposed to be in here,” Benrey replied. 

“Guess we’re both criminals then. Hey... Wanna see something funny?” Gordon smirked, pulling out a gun Benrey had never seen before. 

Against his better judgement, Benrey found himself nodding, transfixed by Gordon’s strange and unusual arsenal of powers. 

Gordon laughed. “Okay, see that big rotor? That’s what we call... the plot flag. Now, Benrey, this may or may not break you irreversibly. But it’ll be fucking funny. Check this out.”

“Gordon, what are you doing?! Hurry the fuck up in there!” The crabby scientist shouted from above, apparently the only one who made it to the test chamber.

Gordon twirled his gun around, pointing it at the rotor. With a crackle of white lightning and sparkles, the rotor disappeared entirely, almost like it had never been there in the first place.

Almost on cue, the crabby scientist in the upper section yelled in confusion, shortly followed by a loud error noise.

Gordon turned back to observe Benrey, only to see him staring up at where the rotor used to be, unharmed. 

“oh hey it’s gone.”

“you some kinda magician? why’d you steal that?”

“I didn’t steal it. Just removed it.”

“well put it back.”

“No... it’s more fun this way.”

Gordon guffawed, and Benrey looked up at him curiously. 

“but the big test?”

“Oh, you wanna do the test still, huh? Well, I’ll let you in on a little secret. The test was gonna go wrong. Here- here, follow me. I’ll show you.” 

Gordon ran off, Benrey giving chase, and he slid back into the test room. Tommy was waiting for him there, waving nervously.

“Um, hello, Mr. Freeman! Um, my coworkers were acting kinda funny, I wanted to know if you-“

A headcrab went flying past Tommy.

20 more headcrabs dropped into the room.

Gordon was hammering out headcrabs with a spawning gun.

Tommy screamed, covering his face as the horde of headcrabs overwhelmed his combat sensors. Gordon snuck past the scientist, tossing his gun up and down.

“so you have a makey-gun, and an unmakey-gun,” Benrey said matter-of-factly, sticking to Gordon like glue.

“Mhm. You’re starting to get it,” Gordon said absently.

“what can you make with the makey-gun?” Benrey asked curiously.

Gordon chuckled again. “Wellll... I was gonna try and break this thing with just Half-Life 1 assets, but if you insist... check THIS out.” 

He shot the gun again, and a strange, somewhat scary yellow creature spawned.

“whuzza?”

“That? Is HH Gregg.”

“Everything’s on sale during Christmas in July, baby.”

Benrey went to poke the HH Gregg. His finger phased through the creature, and he pulled it back in awe.

Gordon spawned another scary yellow thing. “And this is a fucked-up minion.”

Benrey tried touching that one too, only for it to explode.

Coughing, Benrey wiped some soot off his face. He looked up, only to see a very angry-looking Dr. Coomer.

“Doctor Freeman, I- I don’t know WHAT you did, but I SAW outside Black Mesa, and there is NOTHING-“

Gordon silently spawned a Pikachu, and Coomer did the AI equivalent of fainting.

“whuzza?”

“Pikachu?”

“nuh-uh.”

Gordon looked at the Pikachu, only to see it was pink and black. “Oh. That’s missing a texture.”

“missing... tex-ture?” Benrey said quietly, walking up to the Pikachu and touching it. He slowly pulled off his helmet, and Gordon very quickly realized he wasn’t trying to show off his greasy, HL2 Barney-esque hair, but rather, the inside of his helmet, which had the same missing texture file. 

“show me more,” Benrey whispered.

“More? Fucked up things I have in my inventory, you mean?” Gordon said with a chuckle.

“...more,” Benrey repeated, looking over at Gordon. “viddy game stuff. fucked up viddy game stuff.”

Gordon squinted, then obliged with a nod. With a flick of his wrist, he spawned something that was supposed to be- what was it, a lemon?- Whatever it was, there was only a big ERROR now.

Benrey, sliding his helmet back on, picked up the error, amazed at how to him, it felt small, round and bumpy, but he was holding a giant, flashing word. The red light was... somewhat comforting to him.

“hey. can i, uh.”

“can i take you somewhere?”

Gordon paused, mulling over the thought. “Nowhere that I haven’t already been, but sure.”

“...please. you wanna have fun, right? let’s go have fun at my place.” Benrey’s eyes pleaded with Gordon, though his voice remained as dry as ever.

“Y’know what? Sure. Why not. I can show you more stuff there. Take me.”

Gordon took Benrey’s hand, and he squeezed his eyes shut, willing the two of them to noclip. Not just through Black Mesa’s lobby, but all the way through each and every map, triggering flags out of order, breaking NPCs as they zipped by, a rush of game-breaking in their wake.

They finally came to a stop in a dank, echoing chamber. Gordon opened his eyes, looking around. As he stepped forward, he heard a telltale splash of a puddle.

“This is...”

“the final boss area,” Benrey finished quickly, rubbing his arm.

“But the final boss isn’t here. Benrey. Did you- did you fucking kill Nihilanth? Did we break the game that bad?” Gordon cackled, doubling over on himself. Benrey started at him seriously, waiting for Gordon to stop.

Gordon looked up, and Benrey breathed in, his form jittering and shaking. For a second, only a skeleton was there, but then, Benrey grew, and grew, and he wouldn’t stop growing. He fell into the water, hoisting his upper body up slightly to stare at Gordon.

He wasn’t scared. 

Gordon came closer to Benrey, touching his hand and muttering to himself.

“So the code of the final boss is in... You.”

Gordon looked up at Benrey. “How much do you know? About this being a game, I mean?”

Benrey shrugged. “eh. i know ‘m not supposed to be like this. i know this is kinda fake. i don’t really care though.” 

Gordon laughed. “Good answer. So why were you on my ass about passports, huh?”

Benrey blushed slightly, resting his head in one of his hands. “iunno. thought it’d be funny. y’know. that’s what guards do. butttt you kinda did all this stuff. and now we’re here.”

“Now we’re here,” Gordon repeated. “You expected me to play along, huh. Uh. Sorry for not letting you have your fun, I guess.”

Benrey blew some bubbles in the puddle. “don’ really care. this is more fun.” 

“Good. Because I’m not about to go back to Black Mesa and try and fix the game.”

“the game you broke?”

“Exactly.”

They both laughed, Benrey’s laugh rumbling through the chamber.

“So, uh, you gonna stay big while I spawn some funny stuff?” Gordon asked.

“here. lemme scoop you up so you can spawn it near me,” Benrey said, grabbing Gordon by the HEV suit’s neckpiece like a cat by its scruff. He held Gordon up with his hands, eagerly waiting for Gordon to make his next move. “okay, gordo. show me what being in a video game means.”

Gordon smirked. “Is that a challenge? Because I have some weird shit in my inventory.”

“maaaybe it is. what’re you gonna do about it?”

“Okay, well, check this shit out.” Gordon fired a new gun and Benrey stared at the large spray that was now on the cavern wall. 

“okay so what’s that.”

“That’s, uh, buff Dedede.”

Gordon interrupted himself with laughter, and Benrey couldn’t help but join in. Gordon fell over, laughing and Wowozela-ing and spawning as many things as he could.

The Xen chamber rumbled with mutual laughter, not unalike giggly preschoolers at a sleepover.

In 1999, the original Half-Life was praised by critics for its immersive storytelling and environments, as players felt they were literally venturing through Black Mesa.

In 2020, the game never really held up as well as it did.

Maybe that made this whole situation funnier.  
Maybe it made finding a friend in a low-poly guard model who was supposed to be the final boss all the more ridiculous.


	2. to borrow a face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gordon Freeman wakes up for the first time- Gordon Freeman wakes up for the second.

Gordon Freeman was a man who, after graduating from MIT, worked at Black Mesa. He was to be the test subject for the Xen Crystal test that would be happening.

...Did happen?

Was happening??

Gordon didn’t know. He didn’t know why he was in Xen, of all places, or why a security guard- 

No, no. That THING was not a guard. It dressed like one, had the helmet of one, but it was huge... towering, imposing, and something felt deeply, deeply WRONG. 

...No, he’s seen this thing before. He doesn’t know where, but he just- there’s a feeling, deep in his gut.

The figure immediately crashed down into the puddle, cackling with excitement as his catlike pupils shrank. 

“ohhh yo, you’re BACK! back awake! i thought you’d neeeeever wake up. okay, what’s- what’s next on the fucked up video game agenda? do you have stuff from heavenly sword? on the playstation 3? oh, oh, how about call of duty AIR STRIIIIKE?”

The giant smiled excitedly, waiting for a response. 

Gordon backed up slowly, falling over into the water. His limbs scrambled to get a grip on the wet floor, trying to get as far away from the ‘guard as possible. A cold jerk ran up his spine as he felt something cold press up against his back, and close on his suit.

A hand. 

Gordon was lifted close to the guard’s face, much to his horror. The guard studied him, waggling him in the air a bit.

“heeeey... what’s the matter with you, man? you scared of your friend benrey? we’re BEST FRIENDS, we played in the- in the lab, with the crabs, and the scientists, and hh gregg... you- you remember?”

“No! No, I don’t, I- I don’t know who you are! I was supposed to be in the test chamber, not- not PLAYING in a lab! I don’t even know where we ARE!” Gordon shouted, panic making his voice hoarse.

The guard- Benrey, apparently- frowned. “yeah, yeah, i get it, you don’t wanna tell me your real name, but this is a baaaad joke. be funny again please.”

“Please don’t fucking eat me,” Gordon whined. “Wh-Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance? Because he had no-body to go with...! Aha ha... Haaaaa...” 

Benrey made a face. “dad jokes. you really are kinda fucked up right now.”

“Listen, man, I don’t- I don’t know what you want. I was supposed to do my job, with- with Dr. Coomer and Bubby and Tommy, back at the lab, they’re- they’re my friends. Please don’t kill me,” Gordon begged.

Benrey blinked once or twice. “friend?”

“Yeah! F-Friend! You know what those are, right? Y’know, when you hang out with someone a lot, and you talk about stuff together, and- and stuff, please- fucking let me go, PLEASE... I’d like to see them again.”

Benrey sighed, rolling his eyes and setting Gordon down. “if you wanted to go back you shoulda just said so.”

A loud crack resonated through the cavern as Benrey stretched, his form contorting into itself as a pile of bones clattered into the water. They reassembled, forming a skeleton, as skin and clothes wrapped itself around it. 

Benrey was back- this time, he was Gordon-sized... and actually quite small, if he was being honest. He stuck out his hand, wading forward in the water.

Gordon hesitated for a second. Why did- 

Did Benrey just like holding hands??

“grab on,” Benrey muttered, looking away and blushing.

Gordon obliged, of course, and immediately, the world started... flying by. There was no other explanation for it. It felt like a strong gust of wind pushed past the both of them, but not a hair on Gordon’s head was really moving. The world went by faster than he could even fathom- he recognized bits and pieces of Black Mesa, but they were a fleeting glimpse and nothing more. 

Then, just like that, it was over. They were back in... the beginning.

Of Black Mesa, he meant. You know, the entrance, where he could- 

Gordon stopped. He turned to Benrey with a glassy-eyed smile.   
“Hello, sir. Can I help you?”

Benrey snorted. “ha ha, plot flag triggered. very funny.” He shoved Gordon, which seemed to knock him back to his senses.

“Ugh... fuck. Travel sickness... I think I hate this already,” Gordon muttered. He turned to face the entrance.

The entrance was closed, and there was naught a guard in sight to open it. He pressed his hands against the cold metal, trying to get it to budge, but remaining unsuccessful.

Benrey snorted. “full of jokes today, man. you wanna go back there? just go, dude! do your no-clippy or whatever it was.”

“Wh- dude, I don’t know what that IS, I just want to go HOOOOME...” Gordon groaned, slamming his head against the door. 

“we could always go back to xen. play some video games,” Benrey muttered. 

“NO THANK YOU! Jesus, okay, let’s just- let’s go find the others, and then work on a way out,” Gordon said, putting a hand on Benrey’s shoulder and then surging forward. 

“we don’t need out, man. there is no out. you feelin’ okay, buddy?” Benrey asked. He got no response, so he quickly hurried behind Gordon.

Well, this was familiar.

Benrey blushed again. Sure, Gordon was being... weirder than usual, more... NPC-ish, but he really idolized the guy and his cool tricks. He didn’t want to mess this up. 

Maybe he decided to find the others for some more fun?

Benrey let out a stream of Wowozela notes. Gordon jumped. 

“GAAAH! What the- what the fuck did you just DO?” He asked, catching his breath.

“...calm down, man,” Benrey muttered, looking away. 

“Yeah, but what is- Why would-“ Gordon poked an orb, eyes screwing shut as it exploded in his face. “What’s with the singing? Is this some kinda Black Mesa... Black Mesa Sweet Voice or something?”

“yeah, actually,” Benrey said, scratching his helmet. “you usually call it wowozela, though.” 

“I don’t know what THAT means,” Gordon sighed, adjusting his glasses. 

“whuh?”

The two of them rounded the corner into the break room, and Gordon immediately launched into another screaming fit.

“HEADCRABS! F-FREAKIN’ HEADHUMPERS! FUCK! BENREYYY!” Gordon ran out of the room, rushing back and forth in the hallway in an attempt to dispel the crabs.

“use your un-make gun,” Benrey said flatly, as if this was obvious information- because it was!

“I DON’T- WHAT?? JESUS FUCK, BENREY, GET OUTTA THERE!”

“nah, man, it’s cool.” 

He looked at a headcrab, blowing some Sweet Voice at it and watching as it exploded. Clearly, Gordon was still proeoccupied, so Benrey thought he’d pay him a solid and get rid of these fucked up little guys. 

He spun around in a circle, the tones of the Sweet Voice going nuts, but it was worth it, as the headcrabs all exploded in a brilliantly bloody fashion, leaving the break room almost as messy as the lasagna someone left in the microwave. 

The only non-blood object was the blooDY form of a scientist, forced into a huddle on the floor. He was shaking. 

“yo.”

Gordon ran back into the break room, nearly slipping on the blood. 

“Oh my god, Tommy, is that you?” 

The man looked up, his piercing yellow eyes being the only thing not covered in blood. “M-Mister... Freeman??” 

Tommy immediately went back to his huddle, and Gordon crouched down, wiping some of the blood off his face. “Tommy, thank fuck we found you... I woke up on this- this alien planet, and this guy was here, and I didn’t know where any of you were...” 

Tommy batted Gordon’s hand away. “Y-Stop talking like that, Mr. Freeman! You- You were the one who filled this place with headcrabs! You made the experiment go wrong! You... How- How COULD you?!” He was angry, and sad, and scared, maybe all at the same time... which resulted in more blood getting washed off, this time by Tommy’s tears.

Gordon backed up in horror. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. The test... HE had fucked it up? HE was the reason these aliens were everywhere? No, that- that couldn’t be right, he’d REMEMBER if he did that...

Wouldn’t he?

Benrey approached Gordon, hesitantly tapping him on the shoulder. 

“hey-“

Before he could finish, Benrey’s attention was caught by a deep blue rectangle popping in front of his vision. There was an image on the left of it, but it was a silhouette, and text that read only one thing:

“MS KITTLES PRENCH CLASS is now playing Half-Life 1”. 

Benrey looked past the rectangle, as he heard Gordon scream in pain. The man bucked backwards, grabbing at his face as he glitched in and out of view. The glitchy mess was a kind Benrey had only ever seen on himself- what made things worse was Gordon’s cries of anguish that only faded into clipping the ingame mic, much like Benrey was known to do.

Benrey didn’t know what to do. Was it safe to touch him? Would he just make things worse? However, he had little time to decide, because just like that, it was all over. Gordon’s upper half went limp, and stayed there for a second, until, like a robot powering back on, Gordon stood upright once more. 

He looked back at Benrey, his eyes flashing a bright pink. 

“Hey. You. Benrey. Any reason why we’re back here? Did autosave fuck up?” 

...That was the first time Gordon had made reference to the game ever since he had woken up.

Gordon stepped closer, waving a hand in front of Benrey. “Hellooooo? You remember me? Mister Gooordon Freemaaaaan?”

Benrey nodded quickly. 

Gordon smirked. “Dope. It’d be annoying to break this thing AGAIN. Doesn’t explain why we’re back here, though...” He put a hand to his chin. “Game probably got sick. Xen is probably a no-no zone.”

It hit Benrey like a tidal wave.

Everything strange about Gordon, the way he had been acting, his odd attachment to the NPCs that he lacked, his obliviousness to this being a game...

Him and the scientists weren’t the only ones who were sentient.

Gordon Freeman was alive.

And that was BAD. 

What was Gordon experiencing right now, Benrey wondered? Was it like a nap for him? Did he see everything this guy was doing?

This guy... Benrey couldn’t really call him Gordon, could he? Gordon 2 and False Gordon were too long. He thought back to the blue rectangle- MS KITTLES’ PRENCH CLASS.

...Kittle.

He’d call his friend Kittle. 

“uh, actually, you kinda, uh. how do i say this. you-“

“Mr. Freeman, what- what WAS that? You keep avoiding my questions! I’m- I’m SICK of it!” Tommy said, standing up and taking on a bold expression.

Kittle looked back at Tommy, a sneer on his face. “Oh, look what we found. Hey, leave us alone, huh? I just got back to Benrey, I wanna show him Mokujin.”

“N-No! This can’t wait! You- You KNOW something we don’t, Mr. Freeman! I won’t let you hide it from us any longer!” Tommy yelled, shakily pulling out a gun.

Kittle laughed. “Oh, man, you’re pulling a gun on me? Wow, now I wish I had really fucked with you guys more. ‘Enhanced Virtual AI’... enhance THIS, buddy.”

Kittle pulled out a phys gun, and Tommy’s gun was yanked from his hand. His arms began flailing wildly, which, as Benrey quickly deduced, was Kittle waving them around. 

“Ohhh, look at me, I’m Tommy, I’m gonna use my propeller hat to TAKE OFFFF! PSHWWWWWW!” 

Kittle did something, and suddenly Tommy was sent flying into the ceiling. Kittle cackled, but Benrey flinched. Sure, it was funny to see his friend’s cool powers totally own anyone who got in their way, but he...

He had just seen Tommy on the floor in a bloody heap, sobbing and begging Gordon to tell him something, ANYTHING.

The scientists didn’t know they were in a game. Didn’t have the capacity Benrey had.

...So why was this a lot less fun, all of a sudden?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOAH MULTICHAPTER FIC?? yeah! this was originally supposed to be a One Shot but i realized that this accidentally has some incredible story-breaking potential... so we will see where this goes. we will See


	3. fixed with liquid gold

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> AI gets fucky, more at 8.

The G-Man did not have much flavour text to go off of. 

He was a being beyond space and time, beyond Earthly comprehension, and his job was to ominously hover just out of Gordon Freeman’s reach, only to corner him for a ‘job opportunity at the end of the game.

He did not have a family, and he was not supposed to break his story beats.

The first point was broken a long time ago, in a hypothetical Dunkin’ Donuts.

The second point was broken just now.

Time stopped, and he appeared before Gordon with a scowl.

“...Doctor Freeman. I would appreciate it if you stop... antagonizing my progeny.”

He was met not by confused silence, but by ear-splitting laughter. The G-Man couldn’t help but flinch. Gordon wasn’t supposed to be moving. Why was he moving?

“Oh, man, this game’s BUSTED busted,” Kittle said, elbowing Benrey. “You know this guy? This guy right here isn’t supposed to be here.”

Benrey’s eyes lit up with recognition. This man needed credentials!

“you- you got playstation plus?” Benrey said with a chuckle as Kittle leaned on his helmet. “can i see your credentials?”

“I- they’re in my... other coat, I- I was talking to Mr. Freeman-“ G-man said crossly.

“No, let the man speak!” Kittle said with a smirk. “He’s right, you know. This is a passport-required area. You got your passport?”

“I- Mr. Freeman, you-“

“i want a free month of- of psn, man,” Benrey piped up.

“Give the man his PSN, won’t you?” Kittle laugher. 

“MISTER FREEMAN. I am here to stop you from... meddling in my son’s affairs,” G-man cut them both off with a huff. 

Kittle burst out laughing again. “You- HA- a SON?? You’re the goddamn G-man, dude, you don’t have a SON.”

He looked back at Tommy, who was still frozen in time, and smirked. “Listen, I’m kinda over you. It’s funny that you got a son and stuff, but you’re a story NPC. And I’m not here for the story.” 

“So you’ll leave him alone then?” G-man said expectantly.

“Nope,” Kittle replied. He pointed at Tommy and a beam fired out of his finger. Tommy’s model was switched from a Half-Life 1 scientist to a Half-Life 2 Combine NPC. 

G-man whirled around in surprise. “T-Tommy? Hello??” 

He got no response.

“Man, you guys really teamed up to not let me have fun, huh? Alright, fine. This is mono a mono, Valve. I’m gonna do everything in my power to break this game in half, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me! Y’know... since you’re still an NPC.”

Kittle erupted into mocking laughter, flicking G-man in the face. “Alright, c’mon, Benrey. Let’s get away from these losers.”

As he walked off, Benrey turned to look at the G-man fretting over his busted son one last time.

...He tried to swallow those feelings and just think of things that made him happy.

Like Heavenly Sword. 

“...Are they gone?” 

G-man looked around. There was a voice, but he couldn’t discern where it was from...

“Dad! It’s me!” The Combine guard reached for his helmet, lifting it off to reveal Tommy- sure, his scleras were black instead of white now, but he remained intact.

“Tommy!” G-man immediately pulled him into a hug. “Oh, I was... beside myself with worry... I am not sure how Mr. Freeman possesses these... abilities, but...”

“Dad, I don’t- I don’t know what he’s talking about. He keeps mentioning a game, and now th- now this...” Tommy patted his father slowly, desperately rambling in the hopes that his father would assure him that everything was alright, and it was all a bad dream. 

However, his father remained silent, and they let the silence hang there for a painfully long time. Neither of them knew what to say. 

“Tommy... my time here is... growing slim.” G-man dusted Tommy’s shoulders off, still not used to the Combine outfit on his son. “Find the others. We need to... dispel Mr. Freeman. Somehow. You’ve always been so smart, Tommy... I know you can do it.”

Tommy sighed. “I’m scared.”

G-man smiled. “You’re brave,” he corrected. 

Then, the world started moving again, and the G-man disappeared, leaving Tommy alone.

...He wasn’t alone. Bubby and Dr. Coomer were out there somewhere, and he needed to find them.

Tommy gripped the baton he now held, clearing his throat. 

Time to search. 

He made his way out of the break room, grip on his baton tightening as he looked around the halls. With any luck, Dr. Coomer and Bubby would be where Tommy saw them last- the locker room and near the test chamber.

Tommy looked inside the locker room excitedly, a cry of “Doc-!” quickly dying on his lips as he found that nobody was there. 

There’s nothing there. 

Tommy shook off his growing unease, moving to check the next place. The test chamber was further ahead, so he’d have to get there... alone...

All alone...

Tommy was holding his baton so tight it might snap. 

He ducked under the broken door that led to the next room, and froze when he heard two voices- two very FAMILIAR voices. 

“I gotta show you YTP sexer, man. It’s a classic. Trust me. Your humour is gonna be revolutionized,” Kittle said, nudging Benrey.

“heh. how you gonna show me a video with no screen, IDIOT?” Benrey said jokingly, knowing Kittle had an answer in mind.

“Like this.” Kittle turned back to the scientist they had cornered- Not just any scientist... that was Bubby! 

Kittle pulled out yet another strange-looking fun and shot it at him. Luckily, Bubby himself appeared to be unharmed, but Kittle had apparently rigged him somehow so that he was playing a Youtube video. 

“woah,” Benrey said quietly. “video.” 

“You should have seen the Gregg tube I made,” Kittle said with a boastful laugh. “Big tube, rigged to play HH Gregg... It’s fantastic.” 

“the tuuuube,” Benrey repeated, clapping his hands together. 

“Ahhh, YTP sexer... truly the Minecraft of sex. Oookay, I’m bored. None of the puzzles are here,” Kittle said. “Let’s move.”

Benrey nodded, looking back at Bubby, who gasped as he recovered from being used as an impromptu video player. 

It was all fun and games, right? Nobody gets hurt.

Him and Kittle noclipped out of there.

“Bubby!” Tommy cried, rushing over to his friend. “Are- are you okay?” He took Bubby’s body weight on, lifting his arm over his shoulder.

Bubby groaned, looking Tommy up and down.  
“...The fuck happened to you?”

“Me?? What happened to YOU?” Tommy said nervously.

“Gordon,” they both said at the same time.

Their eyes met, and they understood- Gordon had fucked around and left them both like this.

“Well... at least you seem- seem to be okay,” Tommy said, brushing Bubby’s coat off.

“That motherfucker... I don’t know what he did to me, but I’ll say! I didn’t like it!” Bubby huffed, crossing his arms. 

“Well... I wanna- wanna find Dr. Coomer and- and we can all think of a way to- to stop him... That sound like a plan?” Tommy asked.

“HELL yes it does!” Bubby cackled, slapping Tommy on the back. “I always knew you had potential!” 

“Hah...” Tommy laughed along nervously.

The two of them were about to check the test chamber, when Bubby stopped in his tracks, his glasses lighting up with a loading symbol. All of a sudden, Rick Astley’s Never Gonna Give You Up started playing through his glasses, and Tommy sighed.

“I- I think Mr. Freeman has all his video screens connected.”

“That’s.... fun.”

He grabbed Bubby by the hand and pulled him to the chamber, knowing they couldn’t afford to slow down.

Guess mediashares were going to be a permanent fixture of the team.

“Dr. Coomerrrr? Hellooooo? It’s me, Tommy!” Tommy called, careful not to hit his baton to his face. 

“Ig-ignore the Rick Astley, Bubby’s kinda... fucked up at the moment....” 

Silence. 

He wasn’t here, either.

Did-

Did Dr. Coomer die in the resonance cascade?

Tommy’s grip on Bubby’s hand unintentionally got tighter, as his breathing got stuck in his throat. 

No... No no no, he- Dr. Coomer was his friend! He needed HELP! He couldn’t- He WOULDN’T-

A loud burst of static noise interrupted Tommy’s panic- louder than even Rick Astley. 

He looked around, eyes darting around the room. What WAS that? 

“-mmy!” 

There was static, and what sounded like a voice...?

“Tommy!” 

A being that looked almost entirely like radio static emerged from the wall, save for their green eyes, which stared at Tommy. 

“GAH!” Tommy flinched, hiding behind Bubby.

“Woah, what are you screaming about- WAH!” Bubby came back to consciousness, immediately trying to hide behind Tommy.

“Please, don’t let my incorporeal form frighten you! It’s me! Your friend, Dr. Coomer!” The static-man smiled cheerfully.

Come to think of it, the figure DID have Coomer’s exact outline... 

“Doc- Doctor Coomer...?” Tommy approached him. “What... happened...?” 

Coomer sighed. “Oh, Tommy, I just can’t put on a brave face...”

“When Gordon ran past me, he told me that this was all fake... none of it was real... I couldn’t handle it. I think... I think we’re in a video game, Tommy.”

Tommy widened his eyes. “That’s-“

He sighed. “It makes sense. It’s a lot less scary, thinking about it... because Mr. Freeman’s scared us all half to death already.” 

Coomer nodded. “I’m not one for video games... that makes figuring out the logistics of this quite difficult.” He looked up at Tommy, gesturing to himself. “...Any ideas?” 

“Maybe...” Tommy put a hand to his chin. “Maybe your body got so overloaded that you glitched out of it.”

“Oh! How wonderfully depressing!” Coomer said with a sad smile.

“Listen, both of- both of you,” Tommy said, gesturing to Bubby as well. He was clearly freaking out about being in a game, and was pretty bad at hiding it. “I think- I think this is real.”

“We- we have thoughts, and feelings... to this is real to us. Let’s- let’s MAKE it real!”  
He pumped a fist in the air, and his two companions looked at him.

“...So what you’re saying is we kill everyone and take this game for ourselves?” Bubby said excitedly.

“Ahh... I mean, n-not really, but-“ Tommy began, flustered.

“We can kill Gordon! That’s called a compromise!, Dr. Bubby!” Coomer said helpfully. 

“Are you okay...?” Tommy asked quietly.

“Nope!” Coomer laughed. “The existential dread has already begun to set in!” He frowned. “...But if I don’t do something now, I won’t have any game to be trapped in. And Black Mesa is better than nothing.”

He shivered. “I’ve seen outside Black Mesa. There’s nothing there. I’m not going to let that happen to you two.”

Tommy silently tried to hug Coomer, only to find his hands passed through the static.

“...We might need to find you a new body. That’s- that’s on the list. Find Mr. Freeman, find a new body,” Tommy said.

“Agreed! Well, lead the way, gentlemen!” Coomer said, phasing entirely through the wall and trying to line up his feet so that it looked like he was properly standing on the ground.

Tommy smiled. It was a bit of a team of misfits, but... it was a team. And that was all they needed.

Meanwhile, Benrey was trailing behind Kittle like a lost puppy.

“so uh, where we headed? fun puzzles? fun puzzles, sir?” Benrey piped up, and Kittle gave him a passing glance.

“I’ve got a real cool idea,” Kittle said with a smirk. “You know what NPCs hate fighting? Other NPCs- ‘specially when they’re not programmed to.”

“It’s a real shitshow, Benrey, two scientists get into a fistfight and you never hear the end of it. Which is why we’ve gotta pay a visit to the potions master!” Kittle stuck a finger up triumphantly.

“to get a potion?” Benrey asked.

“No, not- we don’t need potions. I wanna make the potion master attack the other guys. They’re still out there somewhere, I know it! Tommy’s gone for good, definitely, but Bubby’s still working when he’s not a video player, and Coomer’s... I dunno where that guy is,” Kittle replied. 

“oh. that’s- that’s cool,” Benrey muttered, looking away. 

“It is. You never see mad scientists in Half-Life, man! I’m about to break new ground!” Kittle laughed, as they headed closer and closer to the alleged cybernetics department.

Benrey wanted to find the rest of the team  
himself. 

He could use some of the knowledge Kittle gave him, even if it meant going behind his back...

It was fine. He would never find out.

As he walked, Benrey squeezed his eyes shut, concentrating. 

Possess a model, possess a model, possess a model...!

>NEW MODEL ADDED FOR PLAYER:BENREY

>ACCESSING HL1_SOLDIER...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> and now we see how everyone in this au is effected! more or less! i’m thinking of calling this au the worldstop au or the asshole player au, both roll off the tongue pretty well- i just kinda went with whatever crazy thought popped into my head wrt the other npcs so. hello!


	4. both ends of the candle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> forzen and benrey... benrey and forzen. benrey is a team player.

Picture, if you will, being a homeowner- a single homeowner. You live a wonderful, secure life, with enough sustenance for one person. One day, unexpectedly, you hear your doorbell ring. 

You open the door, only to find a baby at your doorstep, the parent long gone.

You never asked for a child.

You never asked for a sentient human being.

Why is the child now your responsibility? You never asked for that.

All you wanted to do was see who was at the door.

... Alternatively. Imagine if you break a child out of a hostile environment. They continue to bully people at their rescue shelter, but they were taught that way.

Do you blame them?

Do you treat them like a victim when they’re making victims?

And what if you ripped a leaf off a tree, not knowing it was killing it slowly?

You were only playing around, but now look what you’ve done.

What if you turned an ugly, broken cup into something more beautiful?

If you leave someone alone, what will they create?

There are a million voices all screaming out.

But only one can be heard. 

————————————————

“YOU SAY SUMMER LOVE!”

Tommy groaned in frustration as Bubby froze, playing Alex Chiu for the fifth time that day. This was starting to become a regular occurrence, and Tommy did not like it one bit.

He felt like they were walking in circles, despite the fact that they were constantly moving further into Black Mesa- there wasn’t any sign of Gordon and Benrey, no matter how hard they looked, and every other scientist they ran into usually backed away awkwardly, as a man in a Combine outfit dragging a scientist playing Alex Chiu behind him was not exactly a regular occurrence. 

He sighed, stopping in his tracks. “Dr. Coomer, I’m not sure if we can find them at this rate-“

“Hello, Tommy!” Dr. Coomer chirped. He was standing in front of him, fully human again. 

Tommy stumbled back, gripping at his chest. “Gah! Doc- whuh- HOW?”

“My clone!” Coomer chirped. “I’m simply borrowing his body for a bit.” 

“That’s...” Tommy smiled nervously. “That’s great! That means you can- can interact with stuff again, right...?”

The doctor nodded. They moved into a room with turrets, and the Coomer clone got targeted instantly, dropping to the ground.

The static-form of Coomer sighed, crossing his arms. “I could have survived that.”

Tommy mimed patting him on the back.

They trudged forwards some more, neither one of them wanting to make small talk in the midst of the blaring music- small talk eventually led to talking about the reality they currently found themselves in...

And neither of them felt very much like talking about THAT. 

Luckily, Bubby finally jolted back to life, huffing in relief.

“If he plays Alex Chiu one more fucking time...” The scientist grumbled. He adjusted his glasses, looking up at the group.  
“...Why’d we stop?”

Tommy pointed ahead, wielding his baton as it sparked to life. Standing in a corridor was an... awkward-looking soldier.

His complexion was corpselike, and there was a shadow under his eyes that really didn’t seem to be coming from any natural light source. He held himself awkwardly, like he wasn’t used to his larger frame, and his head tilted downwards, his eyes an unnatural shade of blue.

“yo.”

“Stay back! What do you want from us?!” Tommy shouted, instinctively sticking a hand out in front of Bubby and Coomer even though he knew they could hold their own.

The soldier moved to open his mouth, letting it hang for a second as he realized he didn’t actually know what he was going to say. God, Benrey was an idiot! Why didn’t he think about this sort of situation?!

“...i just wanna graduate,” the soldier said quickly, hating every new syllable that slipped out of his mouth. 

Benrey knew this was a stupid plan.

Tommy narrowed his eyes as the soldier winced, feeling his judgemental stare. He wasn’t buying any of this.

“um. kittle fucked up my code too. look,” the soldier said, quickly pulling the errored lemon Kittle had given him out of his pocket.

“...Who’s-?” Tommy muttered.

“gordon! i meant gordon. i’m so fucked i can’t even remember names, bro....”

The group all looked at eachother. 

“So... how good are you at killing?” Bubby asked.

“Bubby!!” Tommy whined, whipping his head over to glance at his colleague.

“What? I’m asking the important questions!” Bubby replied with a huff. 

“We don’t know if we can trust him!”

“Like what, he’s with the military? I could take all those fuckers down in no time!”

Tommy looked back at the soldier with a sigh. Gordon didn’t seem to be interested in amassing spies or a legion of allies, and that error box he pulled up was a bit fucked...

“...Okay. What’s your name?” Tommy asked.

“f- forzen,” Forzen replied, unsure and sounding like he had made it up on the spot.

(Which Benrey did.)

“Hello, Forzen!” Coomer said with a smile, even if that last ‘Forzen’ got a little buried under the static. 

“Have you- have you, um, seen a man in an orange suit anywhere? Maybe with a- a security guard following him?” Tommy asked, tugging at the fabric around his neck nervously.

Forzen paused. 

...He knew the team wanted to find Kittle, and maybe Kittle would be impressed and he’d take them under his wing like he did Benrey. 

But what if he was leading them into a trap? What if Kittle had some sort of plan? He HAD been talking to the potions master for a while, and Benrey was too busy possessing this soldier model to focus on their conversation...

...No. They asked, so Forzen would give them an answer.

What’s the worst that could happen?

“i think they were heading to the... mixology department,” Forzen said with a nod. “i tried to slow them down with a... a beyblade.”

Tommy’s eyes sparked with recognition. “Beyblade...?”

“ohhhhhh, let it ripppp,” Forzen said excitedly, forgetting that he was still on thin ice. He pulled a Beyblade out of his backpack, showing it off. “ULTIMATE DRAGOOOOON”

Tommy quickly ran forward, seemingly forgetting he was supposed to be being cautious as well. He pulled out a Beyblade of his own, immediately launching it on the ground as Forzen joined him.

“You- you know, usually you shouldn’t spin them on the ground, cos’ of scratches, but there’s no portable arenas in Black Mesa,” Tommy explained as the two metal tops clashed against each other.

“yo, they got ARENAS?” Forzen gasped.

Tommy nodded, watching as Forzen’s beyblade came to a halt. The soldier picked it up with a frown, stuffing it back inside his backpack.

“HA! That’s why you don’t fuck with us!” Bubby said triumphantly.

“These bit-beasts are quite powerful!” Coomer added with a smile. 

“pffft. i’m not a sore loser,” Forzen bluffed, crossing his arms.

Tommy sighed. “Okay, that’s- that’s enough Beyblades. You said Gordon was heading to the mixology department, right? Then that’s... where we need to go.”

Tommy got off, dusting himself off as best as he could. 

Forzen thought he seemed... different, somehow. Tommy’s face lit up the same way it usually did when he was talking about Beyblades, but he seemed more somber than he was before.

For the life of him, Forzen couldn’t figure out why. 

He trailed behind the rest of the team, zoning out just a bit so he could put all his attention back at the mixology department... where he REALLY was.

Benrey looked up from leaning on a wall, seeing multicoloured, rainbow smoke pooling out of the lab door. It reminded him a bit of sherbet... well, now he was hungry. 

The doors slid open, only to reveal a man dual-wielding two glowing beakers, bright orange code rushing across his shades.

“Thirsty?” He said, offering Benrey the rightmost beaker with a smile.

“uhhh-“

Before Benrey could finish, the potion master pulled it back with a laugh. “Kidding! That’s a highly reactive potion that turns you pink. Don’t wanna drink that one, friend. That’s what we call friendly fire!”

Benrey blinked once or twice, studying the scientist. He was decked out in a black coat with neon orange accents... Not like any generic NPC he’d ever seen.

And of course, his mind blanked and he spat out the first thing that came to mind.

“...can i see your passport?”

The scientist’s eyebrows raised in surprise, and though Benrey couldn’t read it, the binary on his shades sped up as he rummaged around in his pocket, pulling out a rectangular booklet and letting it drop. 

Benrey was NOT expecting him to actually have a passport. He leaned forward slightly to read it. The picture was of the same scientist, but he seemed different somehow- his coat was white instead of black. 

“darnold’s not a name,” Benrey said quietly.

“It can be,” Darnold replied. 

Benrey simply backed off, staring at Darnold in awe as the potion master swirled his beakers around. 

“so, uh... where you going?” Benrey asked quietly. 

Darnold’s binary zipped past again, as he paused to think.  
“I’m gonna go, uh, attack the science team.”

“how come?” 

More binary flew past Darnold’s shades.   
“‘Cos I want to.”  
“I don’t think it’s very nice of ‘em to not play along.” 

Benrey looked away. Playing along, huh...  
“take it easy on them please.”

Darnold threw up finger guns at Benrey. “You got it. Nice and easy.”

Darnold sauntered off around the corner, as another person came through the lab door, tap-tap-tapping at a keyboard.

“So? What do you think?” Kittle asked, glancing up at Benrey.

“...of what, darnold?” Benrey replied.

“Yeah, man. Am I good at modding or WHAT?” Kittle chuckled, closing the console. “Cinematic HL2 mod can eat my whole ass.”

“whuzza?”

“Nothing important.”

Kittle yawned, looking through his Gmod menu. “‘Kayyyyy, I’m gonna log off for the day, but I’ll leave you with a few toys. Just because.”

Benrey snuck forward, trying to get a peek at the spawn menu. Suddenly, a giant gun appeared and fell into Benrey’s arms.

“what’s this?”

“A passport,” Kittle grunted. 

He spawned a few more things, including a bunch of pigeons. 

“There. That enough for you to keep yourself entertained with?”

“ostrich,” Benrey said, pointing at the pigeon.

Kittle laughed.

“...Hey, Benrey. I have a question,” he asked quietly.

“about ostrich?” Benrey interrupted, grabbing a pigeon and rotating it from side to side.

“What happens when I log off?”

Benrey stopped, holding the pigeon and staring at it. 

Kittle finding out about Gordon would be... maybe bad. Maybe very bad. 

A little white lie couldn’t hurt.

Just a tiny little lie.

“you go to sleep, bro. ragdoll.”

Kittle laughed. “Fair enough. Guess it’s naptime again.” 

He tapped something Benrey couldn’t see, and pass out he did. His body stayed on the ground for a while, the pigeons eventually making their way on top of him.

Gordon’s eyes opened slowly, and he screamed.

Benrey couldn’t help but cackle as Gordon frantically tried to get the horde of pigeons off him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FORZEN AND DARNOLD ARE HERE!! hooray! im having a lot of fun writing and i hope you guys had fun reading even though the beginning was a bit experimental


	5. hammer of the gods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The potion master gets a taste of what it’s like to PVP.

Dr. Darnold didn’t have much flavour text to go off. None at all, actually.

He was your generic scientist NPC- nothing more, nothing less. Even if he was in charge of the mixology department, his brief window of time was apparently too short for most to care.

Most, apparently, except Kittle.

The Gordon lookalike had sauntered into his lab recently, and though he didn’t say much, the elbowing of a security guard and snickering gave away that he certainly was an interested customer.

Him and Kittle had talked for a while, Darnold listing off everything he’d love to be or have that he didn’t already- confidence, a more powerful arsenal, maybe some cool theme music, better rocket boots: 

The HEV-bearing man nodded, typing it all down in a console, and before Darnold could ask why, he felt himself changing. He felt newer... stronger... like some sort of key had been turned in his body and he was all wound up and ready to go. There was a confidence brimming inside him, like the man he had always wanted to be. 

A fancy visor appeared out of thin air, fitting itself neatly onto his face- binary flew by, though he could understand it, no matter how fast it went. Words like “FIGHT,” “EXPLOSIVE”, “TRAJECTORY”, and “TARGET” were easy enough to grasp amidst the ones and zeroes.

He studied his own, darker outfit, and smiled.

Darnold felt like a whole new man.

——————————————————

As the science team trudged through the depths, Tommy couldn’t help but glance over at Forzen every now and then. The soldier was pale as a corpse, and his movements were so zombielike, as if he had been moving on autopilot for the last few hours.

“Hey, take a picture, bro... it’ll last longer,” Forzen said, eyes suddenly snapping up to face Tommy.

Tommy grunted in surprise. Forzen often wouldn’t speak for hours at a time, so it was honestly a coin-toss with him.

Coomer sped up to join everyone, having found a new body. He gave Forzen a smile as he bunched into the team.

The next room they encountered was quiet, the only real thing of note being some random unmarked tombstones. 

It was a little... too quiet. And dark.

Tommy cracked his baton on the rail, the lightning coursing around it providing a feeble light source. Still there was nothing... though there was no way his torch could hold a candle to the shuddering height of the rafters.

Tommy heard a clank. He shifted, waiting for further movement in the darkness.

He could hear a series of beeps in sequence, and then, a streak of foaming green flew through the sky.

Tommy dove to protect the others, and Forzen stepped back casually, almost as if he expected it. The streak hit the ground with a shatter, and whay was apparently a beaker hissed as the acidic liquid once contained in it ate through the ground.

“What the fuck?!” Bubby yelled up at the rafters. “PEOPLE ARE DOWN HERE, ASSHOLE!”

“Yeah,” someone yelled from the rafter. “I missed!”

Someone was adjusting their footing on the catwalk above, and Bubby froze up. 

“Bubby?” Coomer tried to shake his friend back to reality, but the guitars of the Immigrant Song rang out, just in time for the rev of an engine.

The lights came on- spotlights, to be exact. They shone a vibrant orange all around the room as a man in rocket boots prepared two more beakers.

“Who- who are you?!” Tommy yelled, trying to be heard above the wailing rock.

“Darnold!” Darnold said matter-of-factly. “They call me the potions master!” 

Tommy flinched, a potion flying past him and exploding into fireworks. 

This was bad. Very, very bad.

“Hey, what’s on your mind?” Forzen asked, looming behind Tommy ominously, though it was likely unintentional.

“Uhhhh, a LOT...” Tommy said, trying not to yell. He ducked again, as Forzen got smashed right in the face with a potion.

“Are you okay??”

Forzen blinked, the potion apparently catching on fire- it was put out as quickly as it started.   
“Yeah, man. I’m cool.”

Tommy sighed. “He’s airborne, and we only have melee weapons... This is- this is bad.”

“Oh, you want a ranged thing? Why didn’t you say so??” Forzen asked, reaching into his backpack. He pulled out a large, out-of-place gun and immediately went nuts. Glowing orbs launched into the air, and Darnold dodged them in loop-de-loops.

“Heh,” Darnold laughed, code rushing past his visor. “You’re not so bad, soldier. Prepare for round two!”

“You’re on,” Forzen grinned. He shot out another volley of lights, each exploding in tandem. Darnold’s code took off like a shot as he mixed two potions in midair and sent them flying in Forzen’s direction.

Tommy hopped up and down, trying to get Forzen’s attention. “Um- Forzen, maybe- maybe you could try to lure him down here, please...?”

The soldier blinked once or twice, then nodded. He fumbled around with the gun, dodging potions as he thought up something.

...That would do it.

“HEY! IF YOU’RE SO TOUGH AND STRONG, WHY DON’T YOU COME DOWN AND FIGHT ME HAND-TO-HAND?!”

Forzen smiled nervously. He knew Darnold wasn’t THAT overconfident, but it was worth a try. 

Darnold hovered lower, juggling some potions in his hands as he made sure absolutely nothing spilled. 

“Come on, snake... let’s rattle,” Darnold laughed, catching some beakers in his fingers. 

“RATTLE THIS!” Tommy shouted, whacking his baton in Darnold’s face.

The potion master spun back, reeling. His shades flew clean off as Darnold muttered in confusion, rubbing at his eyes.

Forzen quickly grabbed Darnold’s visor, studying it. Code rushed by, and though Forzen wasn’t quite FLUENT in the binary yet, he could make out the gist of it.

ESCAPE. RUN. RETREAT.

He looked over at Darnold, who stared back at him.

“Here,” Forzen said at last, giving the visor back. It slid onto Darnold’s face like a piece in a puzzle, and as it recalibrated himself, Darnold dusted his coat off.

“Well... I think that’s enough attackin’ for one day. Uh,” Darnold stopped, shaking his fist in the air dramatically. “I’ll get you, or whatnot.”

He let his rocket boots carry him back into the darkness, as Tommy watched him go.

“That was, uh, pretty impressive,” Forzen said, leaning on the railing.

“Yeah...” Tommy sighed.   
“I’ve never seen him around before. Do you think he’s...?”

“With Gordon? I dunno. Maybe. Maybe not,” Forzen muttered, trying to play it off as innocently as possible.

Coomer patted Tommy on the back, heading across the catwalk silently as Bubby came back to his surroundings.

“That was fun,” Forzen said happily.

“I... I mean I guess it was? I’ve never used this thing before...” Tommy looked at his baton curiously. “It’s not a weapon I’m- I’m used to.” 

“Oh, that’s real sucks,” Forzen comforted. “You can borrow mine if you want.”

He pulled out his giant gun, and Tommy, surprised, took it, handing Forzen his baton, which was pitiful in comparison.

“‘Course, I got others in uh. In the bag,” Forzen muttered. It was a lie, but one he needed to tell- if Tommy knew he was spawning guns out of thin air, he’d be suspicious for sure... but still, the guy was majorly bummed out. He deserved a destructive ball-gun. As a treat. 

“...Thank you, Forzen.” Tommy smiled.

“It’s no biggie,” Forzen replied, baring his teeth like a predator before turning it into a crooked smile.

——————————————————

Darnold got teleported back to the mixology lab, not by Kittle, but by Benrey. The guard ran up to him, smushing his cheeks together and tugging at his face.

“yo, you good, man? you got real banged up in that- in that fight.”

“Yeah, I’m okay...” Darnold laughed. “Just a bang-up here or there.”  
“...Wait, how’d you know how the fight went?”

Benrey’s eyes darted away.  
“...not human, man. i see all. ooga booga.” He wiggled his fingers to add emphasis.

“GAH! Benrey, who IS that??” Gordon asked, scooting back from his seat on the ground, though that did nothing to disturb the dozens of pigeons that made him their resting place.

“oh, this is darnold. he’s our bro,” Benrey explained quickly, as he glanced nervously back at Darnold. 

Hopefully he wouldn’t question Gordon’s sudden bout of amnesia... Kittle was getting harder and harder to cover for.

“You’ve got a lotta pigeons there, friend,” Darnold commented.

“Yeah... um, they like me, I guess...” Gordon laughed awkwardly.

Darnold crouched down, lifting one pigeon off Gordon’s head and smiling as he admired it. 

“Hey there, little fella.” Darnold patted it on its head. 

Benrey frowned. This scene was cute, and heart-wrenching. 

Kittle... him and Benrey really needed to talk.

These guys should be able to have just as much fun as him and Kittle do.

There had to be a way. Kittle could listen to reason.

He wasn’t a MONSTER, right...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DARNOLD!! i care him so much and he’s having fun. my boy. anyways hlvrv has accidentally made people soft for kittle. oops!


	6. no tears left to cry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oh this is the BIG FIGHT

As Kittle booted up his session of Half-Life, he was surprised to see most of his VR view being taken up entirely by the low-poliness of a guard.

“hey.”

“we need to talk.”

Kittle grunted. “Okay, first of all, get your face out of my face, dude. I can practically smell you.”

Benrey nodded, crawling off of Kittle and waiting for him to get up. Benrey then silently teleported them to a far-off area… One of the outside zones, he was pretty sure. There were large red rock formations, and the night sky was blue and beautiful.

Perfect place for a talk.

“Okay, Miss Frizzle, spit it out,” Kittle cackled, leaning against one of the rocks.

Benrey fidgeted, willing himself to be big… no, bigger. Kittle had to listen.

“we gotta stop being so mean.”

Kittle squinted, walking over to Benrey’s looming form. His expression was unreadable. 

“What the hell got into YOU, man? I thought you were cool. You really gonna ruin the fun?”

Benrey shook his head. “this- bro, this SHOULDN’T be fun. you gotta listen-!”

Benrey stepped back in horror when he realized Kittle was getting bigger, and that made HIM feel smaller. But, of course, they were the same size now… 

Kittle combed his hair back, lines of pink code cracking under his eyes as if they were struggling to hold his form together.

“You wanna take it outside? Fine. We’ll take it outside.”

Rubble went crashing as Benrey’s feet dug into the concrete, Kittle pushing with all his might against him with a scowl. He wasn’t… scared, strangely enough. Kittle’s face looked less like an evil mastermind and more like… a broody, angry teenager.

He had to keep talking. It was the only way. 

“kitt- gordon, man… i think there’s something you don’t know about the game, dude.” 

“Oh, yeah?” Kittle pushed Benrey onto one of the rock formations, the impact forming a large, Benrey-shaped crater. “What could I not know? I’ve torn source engine games inside-out, man. I’m the KING of destroying games. Nothing gets past me!” 

Benrey grunted, pushing himself up as he scooted along the formations, hands feeling the cold bumps of the rocks. 

“dude, you have to- i’m not trying to be mean, okay? not tryna be baaad. this is important.”

Benrey launched himself off of the rocks, smashing into Kittle as their hands linked once more, pushing against each other in the vain hopes that they’d win the fight. Kittle would be pushed back some, only to push Benrey back more, both of their faces unbearably close to knocking against each other, eyes locked on.

“God DAMMIT, man! I don’t need you LECTURING me! I came here to have some FUN after WORK because my life is the equivalent to WATCHING PAINT DRY,” Kittle growled.

“you can have fun without hurting the others!” 

Benrey tripped Kittle quickly, and Kittle went crashing onto the pavement.

But… he didn’t get up.

At first, Benrey thought maybe he had hit Kittle too hard- he definitely didn’t mean to do that.

But then… Kittle began to speak from his crumpled form on the ground.

“...What do you mean, hurt?”

Benrey winced. He really should have said something sooner…

“the others, bro.”

“they’re like me.”

Kittle’s eyes were glued to the floor.

“Stop it. You’re lying.”

Benrey slowly walked over to him, crouching to his level, as he tilted Kittle’s chin up to face him, seeing the pink threatening to cover his entire face.

“i’m sorry, bro… i didn’t know either.”

“Benrey, I’m-” Kittle gasped out, shuddering. “I’m not a bad person.”

“God- Who am I kidding? I’m an asshole! I can’t- I CAN’T go back to them!”

He yelled, sending Benrey flying. 

“ugh!- dude, it’s not like that! you can’t just give up on making things cool, bro!”

Benrey wiped some blood off his nose, helmet covering his eyes.

“...n’ i don’t think you’re an asshole.”

“you were nice to me. you taught me how to- to have fun and stuff.”

He sighed. “but everyone else deserves to have fun too. please at least try please?”

“How do I know they’ll forgive me? Who am I kidding, they won’t… This is stupid…” Kittle summoned a crowbar, preparing to swing.

“that’s the thing, man… who cares if they don’t forgive you? you’ll still be a bad guy if you don’t apologize… sayin’ sorry is the good thing to do.”

“I don’t WANT to!” Kittle yelled, bringing his crowbar down only for Benrey to block it perfectly, giving him a look that could only be described as pleading.

“please?”

For some reason, that… That was the word that broke Kittle. His body shrank almost immediately, and he fell onto a cold but cushy surface. It didn’t help that he was in a cold sweat- 

How was he supposed to apologize to- to SENTIENT AI for basically playing God and ruining their entire lives?! He couldn’t! He was just a guy! Oh, god, he was gonna faint-

“you okay, bro?” Benrey’s gigantic face looked down at him sadly, and it reminded Kittle of the day they had first met… when Benrey had taken him to Xen and sheepishly showed him his big form. 

“No… I’m not. I’m really fucking not.” 

Kittle tucked his legs into his chest, smashing his face into his little self-pile.

Benrey sighed. “maybe we should start small.”

“...wanna visit the potions master?”

Kittle looked up. “...Yeah, Darnold wasn’t-”

“We can talk to Darnold.”

Benrey smirked despite himself. “i always have the good ideas.”

“Okay, okay, don’t rub it in…” Kittle snorted.

“...Actually, I feel like I should show you something.”

Benrey blinked in surprise, leaning forward a little and waiting eagerly. Kittle always had a new trick up his sleeve, huh?

Kittle stayed there for a while, only to stretch quietly, typing out some commands. A screen popped up near the two of them, and as it flickered on, it revealed the image of a tired-looking brunette with hair fallen over his eyes, a single blonde streak punctuating it as the rest was tucked into a clumsy ponytail. He wore a VR headset, and bore a leather jacket that was haphazardly tossed onto a work uniform.

“-yo, what the fuck is this?”

The man scratched his head, and so did Kittle. 

They both spoke, but only one voice came out. 

“...Nice to meet you, Benrey.”

“My name’s Malcom Challender.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry this chapter is so short and also so late but i have adhd. sorry kings! enjoy anyways

**Author's Note:**

> hello! this is just a messy oneshot about a concept i came up with... like. i just got THINKING... w the idea of hlvrai Being A Game there is the chance that not only would someone not care about keeping in Gordon Mode, but also the chance that a person would straight up just fuck around. and then i thought hey... wouldnt fuck-around player be great friends with benrey. in the sand and in the mud.  
> anyways enjoy. this is nonsense!


End file.
